Sunday, June 10, 2007

Bombs Away!

Picture it: Iraq/Iran/Afghanistan/Any other place where the US is likely to be in a war. Instead of dropping a bomb that would cause massive destruction and death, the US launches a very phallic missile. When the rocket strikes, instead of a mushroom cloud of fire and death, a light lavender scent fills the air. Subsequently, all of the unaware enemy ground forces drop their guns and start playing with guns and each others.

No, this is not the start of a military themed gay porn nor is it a hoax pulled out of the air (I am really not that creative). On Friday, the Pentagon confirmed that US military leaders had considered a proposal from the Air Force's Wright Laboratory in Dayton, Ohio.

The Ohio Air Force lab proposed that a bomb be developed that contained a chemical that would cause enemy soliders to become gay, and to have their units break down because all their soldiers became irresistably attractive to one another. As part of a military effort to develop non-lethal weapons, the proposal suggested, "One distasteful but completely non-lethal example would be strong aphrodisiacs, especially if the chemical also caused homosexual behavior."

It should be pointed out that the military quickly dismissed the idea and never funded the $7.5 million requested to develop the technology.

Still, if the Gay Bomb had been produced and the technology had been successful...I'll leave the fantasies to you...

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Lovely Ladies of the Legislature

Watching the incessant floor sessions this time of year can often be a boring chore. Young staffers are frequently required to monitor sessions to ensure Members are participating appropriately, that important bills are getting the necessary votes, and to provide bosses with all the information they want and need. In the back area of the chambers, staffers whisper critically of the long hours working in the building, the silly arguments made on the floor, and even the fashion choices made by Members.

On that final note, I have made some big observations this week about the status of fashion in the Capitol. Months ago, I critiqued the fashion choices of the boys of the legislature. Today, it’s the girl’s turn.

Assembly Member Galgiani
She is a sweetheart in the Assembly- kind, gentle, and a friend to all. Unfortunately, she needs to bleach her roots. Roots and platinum blonde hair are a deadly combination. But she isn’t the only Member that dresses well but has a horribly dye job—Fiona Ma comes to mind.

Assembly Member Walters
This Republican frequently stands alone in the legislature- both in votes and fashion. She is as likely as not to be the only no vote on a bill she passionately disagrees with. As one of the slimmest elected officials in the California Legislature, she looks like a fashion model in some of the classiest of dresses and suits.

Assembly Member Garcia
We know Ms. Garcia is proud of her curvy body because she reminds us as much frequently, although it has been a while since she has spoken publicly about her breasts. Her suits are exquisitely well tailored to showcase her hourglass figure. Perhaps, too well tailored. How much overtime does her tailor get?

Assembly Member Parra
If you are watching Floor from your TV, you are missing out on the whole picture. Ms. Parra’s shoes cry out to be seen. Seriously, great shoes! Keep an eye open for them!

Assembly Member Strickland
For a pregnant lady, Ms. Strickland is doing a simply fantastic job of keeping herself stylish. The long coats she has been sporting are fabulous.

Assembly Member Berg
Ms. Berg is a kind, older lady. Tiny and frail looking, she has been recently spotted building support for a few progressive bills she cares deeply about (including the Assisted Suicide Bill and the Gay Marriage Bill that was passed yesterday). Typically her outfits are low-waisted, flowy, and very reminiscent of the Roaring Twenties. Paired with long strings of beads and a short hairdo, Ms. Berg has one of the most stunning and unique styles in the Legislature. Kudos to her!

Monday, June 04, 2007

A Sad Comparison

After watching part of the debate between the Democratic Party presidential candidates, I realized I really ought to compare the stances of the popular candidates on several of the big Gay issues of today.

Not surprisingly, the results favor the Democratic candidates. Also, not surprisingly Republican candidates were less likely to have formulated positions on certain issues...except for Mitt Romney. Romney, it seems, has a consistent answer for everything these days. A few years ago, he was supportive of Gay rights, but no longer. Today, he is universally opposed to the "radical homosexual agenda."

On Ending DADT

McCain supports Don't Ask Don't Tell, lauding it as a solution to a difficult problem. Clinton, Obama, and Edwards all oppose it. Giuliani wants it repealed. Romney wants to keep it.

On Gay Marriage

None of the six major candidates openly supports federal marriage equality. However, McCain, Clinton, Obama, and Edwards support the right of states to enact Gay marriage laws. Giuliani recently spoke against the New Hampshire plan to enact strong Civil Unions because they were too similar to marriage. Romney opposes Gay Marriage, universally.


ENDA is the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, legislation intended to ensure that Gay people are not discriminated against in the workplace. All three major Democratic candidates have voiced their support for the bill. McCain opposes the bill. Giuliani doesn't seem to have a position on it. Romney opposes ENDA.

On Hate Crimes Legislation

All three major Democratic Candidates support legislation that would include Sexual Orientation as a basis for hate crimes. McCain, Giuliani, and Romney oppose hate crime legislation.

On Civil Unions

McCain, Giuliani, Clinton, Obama, and Edwards have all spoken frequently supporting the civil unions or domestic partnerships as an equivalent to Gay Marriage. Although such unions are not equal to marriage, they are preferable to no legal union at all. Romney opposes Civil Unions.

On HIV/AIDS Funding

HIV/AIDS is still a monumental concern in the Gay community. As a result support for AIDS and AIDS prevention is paramount.

McCain has long been a supporter of the Ryan White CARE Act to provide AIDS funding in the US. He, Clinton, Obama, and Edwards have each demonstrated their willingness to expand this funding. Giuliani supported AIDS causes as Mayor but has not taken a clear stance on HIV/AIDS funding as a presidential issue. Romney opposes AIDS funding and attempted to reduce AIDS spending as Governor.

On Comprehensive Sex Ed

Giuliani hasn't expressed a position that I could find. Clinton, Obama, and Edwards all support comprehensive sex education programs. McCain doesn't support funding such programs. However he has expressed that he is unsure that condoms are effective prevention against STDs. Romney supports abstinence only sex education which, by its very nature, is not comprehensive.

In conclusion, the three main Dem candidates are fervently courting the Gay vote. Meanwhile, Guiliani and McCain have failed to take strong pro-Gay Rights stances where it really matters. No major candidate from either party is willing to allow Gay Americans to have full, equal rights.

And Mitt Romney opposes Gay Rights.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

The Suspense is Killing Me

For those who are keeping track, Appropriations Madness is over. More than 600 bills were rushed through the the Assembly Suspense Calendar alone. Many of these bills were "held" and virtually killed while most moved on to the floor for a full vote. Additionally, the Senate Appropriations Committee moved along hundreds more bills.

Among the bills killed on Suspense was the controversial spanking bill. Among the bills passed was the measure to legalize Gay Marriage in California.

Worth noting was an article in the Sacramento Bee this week that criticized Assemblyman Mark Leno, Chair of Assembly Appropriations, for hosting a fundraiser the day before the biggest Appropriations hearing of the year. While this is clearly an avenue that eases the ability for high powered lobbyists to reach the chair of Appropriations and, as the CRP said, "doesn't pass the smell test," it is hardly unique to Mr. Leno.

Last year, Governor Schwarzenegger held events during the months of August and September when he is expected to act on every piece of legislation passed by the Legislature during that year. Members of both parties from the Senate and Assembly routinely hold fundraisers during all parts of the year including Budgeting Mayhem and Floorapalooza.

Simply holding a fundraiser during a busy time of the year doesn't necessarily mean a politician is beholden to special interest groups. But in the case of Mr. Leno who is running against Ms. Miggy for the Senate, one must straighten up and fly right. Advice to Mark Leno: Keep Carole's exploits in the news. If this is the worst they've got on you, you've got it made.